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No. 884. 

-*■ OLIVET; -4- 

OR. A RARE 

Teutonic Specimen. 

( FARi. "E. ) 



WITH CAST OF CHARACTERS, ENTRANCES AND EXITS, 

RELATIVE POSITIONS OF THE PERFORMERS ON THE STAGE, 

DESCRIPTION OF COSTUMES AND THE WHOLE OF THE 

STAGE BUSINESS; CAREFULLY MARKRD FROM 

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248 Captured '' 4 

178 Caste 



jE 



^ OLIVET;-^ 

-OR- 

A Rare Teutonic 
Specimen. 

A FARCE 

IN ONE ACT, ' 
J. E> Grarjr, 

Author of "The Old Wi»sid* Inn," 'Ja*e Shloff's Mistake," "Alma y 
or United at Last, 1 '' "Strategy," "The Irish Squire of Squash 
Ridge" "A Noble Atonement.'''' 



TO WHICH IS ADDED 

A DESCRIPTION OF THE COSTUMES— CAST OF THE CHARACTERS- 
ENTRANCES AND EXITS— RELATIVE POSITIONS OF THE 
PERFORMERS ON THE STAGE, AND THE WHOLE 
OF THE STAGE BUSINESS. 

— °— \m 1 1894 

Entered accnrJino to the act of Congress in the year 18^4, by 

AMES' PUBLISHING CO., 
in the office of the Librarian of Conores* at Washington, 



——CLYDE, OHIO :— — 

AMES' PUBLISHING CO. 






* OLIVET; OP, A BABE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 
CAST OF CHABACTEBS. 

As played by Hillsboro Dramatic Club, at Hillsboro 
Opera House, Sept. 22, 1893. 

Gus Monson {A Bare Teutonic Sp ci.n n) J. E. Crary. 

August Monson, (a bashful batchelor) G. H. Dunn. 

Maxmillian Duncan, (who loves Olivet) D. De Forrest. 

Madam Dear, {Prop, of Seminary for girls) . Hattie Myers. 

Olivet, (young and romantic) , Edna Churchill. 

TIME OF PEBFOBMANCE—25 MIS UTES. 

PBOPEBTIES. 
Book of engravings, eueher deck, Monson's card. 

COSTUMES. 

Gus Monson.— A burlesque dutch part, comic costume. 
August Monson.— Old man with marked English brogue. Low 
icut calico vest, old man collar, light coat, checked pants and gaiters. 
Max. Duncan.— Romantic. Business suit. 
Ladies. — Evening costumes. 

SYNOPSIS. 

Curtain rises on a room at Madam Dear's Seminary for girls. 
Olivet conveys the sad news to her lover Maxmillian, that they must 
part. Three years previous to this time, a wealthy batchelor saw 
Olivet singing on the street, he sends her to school, providing she 
will become his wife at the end of three years. The time has ex- 
pired and August Monson, the wealthy batchelor, comes for his 
affianced. By mistake, Gus Monson, the rare Teutonic Specimen, 
comes into Madam Dear's house and is taken for Monson, the 
batchelor. It is discovered that he i<? not the wealthy Mr. Monson, 
the young people dress him up as Olivet, to fool Monson. Madam 
schemes to get Monson to propose to her, which he does and forgives 
all deceptions played on him. Happy ending. 

STAGE DIBECTIONS. 

R., means Right; l., Left; r. h., Right Hand; l. h., Left Hand 
c, Center; s.e., [2d e.,] Second Entrance; u. e.. Upper Entrance 
M. d., Middle Door; p., the Flat; d. f., Djor in Flat; r. c, Righ 
of Center; l. c, Left of Center. 

R. R. C. C. L. C. L. 

*** The reader is supposed to be upon the stage facing the audience. 



TMP92-008967 



OLIVET; 

—OR,— 

A Rare Teutonic Specimen. 

SCENE. — A well furnished sitting room, at Madam 
Dear's Seminary for girls — table and chairs R. c. — 
sofa up l. At rise of cu tain — 

Enter, hurriedly, Olivet and Max. Duncan, d. f., they 
come down R. and l. c. 

0'-v?L Alas Maxmillian, our dream of happiness must 
end. Hold me ere I go cast myself in your briny deep, to 
be food for hungry fishes. Maxmillian, we must part. 

(goes r. , turns lack to Max. 

Max. {comes c.) Olivet! my Olivet, what means these 
strange actions? Why doest thou treat me so cruelly? 
ivet, thou k no west that this heart beats alone for thee. 
When first I saw thy angelic form sporting in the waves at 
Long Branch, my heart went out to thee Daily I prayed 
that destiny would throw me in thy way, and my prayer 
was answered. One day while strolling on the beach, I 
heard a cry for help, wlrch came from the waters. I rushed 
to the rescue, and after a short struggle, I carried thy faint- 
ing form in safety to the sands. When consciousness once 
more came to thee, why did'st thou tell me, that the life I 
had saved, was ever mine own ? Cruel, false hearted girl, 
have I loved tire in vain? Speak, if it be true, I will 
leave thy Bight forever. (goes L., turns back 

Olivet (tu ns to c.) Maxmill : an, my heart is thine, 
concience is mine, but my body belongs to a third party. 



\ OLIVET, OR A RARE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 

Think me false and cruel, if you will, but destiny, which 
threw me in thy way, now decrees that we must part. 

(goes R. turns back 

Max. (c mes c.) Come 01! wt. a joke is a joke, and I 
?njoy a good joke, but there is such a thing as getting too 
much of a good thing. Don't be so deuced earnest in joking. 
Why, the mere mention of our parting, sends the waves of 
despondency coursing up and down my spinal column, like 
amateur bicyclists racing up and down the dusty streets of 
a country village. Olivet, tell me, 'tis but a joke. 

Olivet, (comes c.) I would it were a joke, Maximilian, 
but 'tis too true. You have never heard the story of my 
life. Come, let us be seated and I will tell you why we 
must part. (they sit R. and L. of table 

Max. But I tell you we must never part. Why, 1 
couldn't possibly stand it, "Don't cher know." 
| Olivet. Max, when 1 promised to one day to be your 
wife, I had forgotten that I was the property of another. 
Three years ago I earned my living by singing on the 
streets, depending on the generosity of others for my subsis- 
tence. With no friends or relatives to care for me, I made 
my home wherever night overtook me. One day a police- 
man informed me that a wealthy old batchelor had offered 
to send me to school, if at the end of three years I should 
become his wife, and those three years are up. When Madam 
Dear wrote to my guardian-angel of our engagement, he 
was very angry and forbids it. I can not be your wife 
without his consent. 

Max. Then his consent we shall have, irises) Who is 
my worthy old rival? 

Olivet. His name is August Monson. 

Max. You shall never be his wife. By the skies above 
and the earth below, I swear it! 

Olivet. What can we do ? 

Max. We shall see who wins thee, my sweet Olivet, I 
must away and coll ct my scattered thoughts. 

(exit, D. F. 
Enter, Madam, r. u. e. 

Olivet. How will this end ? 

Madam, (comes r. of table) Heed not the end my 
dear, all will vet be well. I have never seen your kind 



OLIVET, OR A RARETEUTOXTC SPECIMEN. 5 

benefactor, but if thisle:ter \ roves true to it's prophecy, we 
will see him soon, (palls Utter from envelope, dripping 
card) Tin's is what he writes : "Dear Madam, unlooked 
for business calls me to your city, and a 5 * the ihree years 
are up, I will call for my future wi r c • this evening. Tell 
her to prepare to leave with me on the o'clock train, very 
truly, August Monson." 

Olivet, (rises, walks st tge) I will not go w'th him. 
He is a villain to make a young girl link her life with one 
old enough to be her father. 

Madam. Pe calm my dear, wait until he comes. We 
shall find some way out of this dilema. Do not give away, 
for much may happen between now and 9 o'clock this even- 
i g. Come with me. (exuent, R. E. 

Aug. (ofv. ¥.) Veil dot vos all right, better ven you 
do.i't make some foolishness mit me ! 

Enter, August Monson, d. f. 

Obod after-dinnertimes, ladies unt chentlemons. Oh yah ! 
I forgot to knock me dot door on. (goes ra>\s on d. f.) 
Come in ! (comesdou7b\ Veil, I'm here. Nobody at home? 
Veil, den T can ketch mine breathe. You see my gal vot 
vos cilled Katie, vos corned mit dose house in. I vonts to 
see mine Katie, so I comes mit dose house in. I don't see 
my Katie, mabe I vos corned mit dere wrong house in. (sits 
p. of table) Veil I tikes it easy till Katie comes. Vot's 
dot ? (picks up card 

Enter, Madam, r. u. e. 

Madam. Sir ! 

Aug. (scared, goes l., conceilinu card in shoe) Oh no! 
you vos mistooken in dere pnrtv ! I vos somebody else. 

Madam Ts the man crazy ? 

Aug. ! oxcuse me ! (aside) Vate till I ketch mine 
breathe, (aloud) Madam, let me to oxblain. 

Madam. Sir! your business here ? 

Aug. Don't got oxcited, Madam. (asid<) Oh! vot I 
vil : say now ? (goes R. 

Madam,. What right had you to uncerimoniously enter 
my house? This ; " * Seminary for girls, not a lunatic 
asylum. 



6 OLIVET, OR A RA R E TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 

Aug. (asid) Dunder-un-blixen! I been getting scared. 
{aloud) Madam, don't got oxcited. 

Madam. Your name, sir ! What is your name ? 

Aug. I don't got any. {aside) Oh! vate till I ketch 
mine breathe ! 

Madam. Perhaps you have your card about you. 

Aug. Cards ! Oh! yah, I got some cards. 

{draws eucher deck from pocket and holds out 

Madam. How dare you insult me in my own house ! 

Aug. {goes k., frightened — aside) Oh vot I hav' done 
now ! {aloud) Don't got oxcited, Madam, {pulls card 
from shoe) Vos dot vot you vants ? 

Madam, {takes hard and reads) "Mr. August Monson, 
New York City." Can it be possible? Are you August 
Monson, of New York City ? 

Aug. Yah, dot's me. August Monson, unt I lives me 
by Ny York darty-dree years behind time, {aside) How 
de difel she knows dot ? 

Madam. You came sooner than you expected. 

Aug. Oh ! yah, I comes sooner as I expected, {aside) 
Oh ! shimony Christmas ! vot a change in dot voman. 

Madam. I am glad to see you, Mr. Monson, please be 
seated. 

Aug. {aside) Mabey she vos got struck mit mine shape. 

Madam. I did not think to see you so soon, but make 
yourself at home, Mr. Monson. 

Aug. {aside) Oh ! vot a picnic, {aloud) Yah, I vill 
makes myself at home. {sits i, of table 

Madam. I hope, Mr. Monson, that you will not be too 
severe with the dear girl, for she loves the young man very 
much, and besides you are so much her senior, that I am 
sure your union with her would not be as happy as yuu 
might wish. I implore you, re-consider the matter and 
give your consent to their marriage. I love Olivet as I 
would my own child, for she has been a daughter to me ever 
since she came here. 

{during this speech August rises, frightened, moves l. 

Aug. {aside) Danter-unt-blixen, vots dere matter mit 
dot vomans! 

Madam, {rises, comet slowly towards him during 
speech) Oh! sir, if you have not the heart of a monster, 
give up your designs on that poor motherless girl and let 



OLIVET, OR A RARE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 7 

her marry the man she love?. You might compel her to 
marry you, but it would be an unholy alliance. She would 
pine and wither away like the last rose of summer. Filled 
with despair, she might go mad, stark st iving mad ! Some 
night when you were sleeping peacefully in your little bed, 
never dreaming of a danger nigh, sh », drove to desperation 
by torturing confinement, might bury the family hatchet 
deep, deep in your cruel heart. (turns, goes l. 

Aug. Shimany Christmas, vate till I ketch mine breathe J 

Enter, Olivet, r. e. 
Madam. Olivet, this is Mr. Monson, your benefactor. 
Olivet. Oh ! my dear sir, if you are Mr. Monson, I owe 
you a debt of gratitute which I can never pay. 

Aug. Anoter one ? Oh ! vate till I ketch mine breathe ! 
During this speech, August moves to l., followed slowly 
hj Olivet. 
Olivet. Oh ! sir, I know your heart is not as hard as 
you would have us believe. You could not be so cruel as 
to condem me to a life of torture with you, when my heart 
belongs to another. Oh! sir, have mercy and give your 
consent to our marriage. I intreat you, I implore you, 
remove your objections, give us your consent and your 
bkssing. 

Auj. Vate till I ketch mine breathe ! (aside) Oh ! vot 
I vill say now ? (aloud) Ladies unt chentlemons, I don't 
got any objections, I agrees mit every dem ting vot you says ! 
Madam.) (each t iki him by hand) Then you give 
Olivet. J your consent to the marriage? 
Aug. Dot's vot I said. 
Madam. \ Oh ! you dear good man ! 
Oliyst. ) (throw arms about his neck 

Aug. Oh ! vate till I ketch mine breathe. Break avay ! 
Olivet. You have made me so happy. 
Aug. Ish dot so? 

Madam. You have made us so happy. 
Aug. Ish dot so? (aside) Shimony Christmas, vot a 
chang ; in dose vimins! Vate till I ketch mine breathe ! 
Madam. May the hinges of our friendship never rust. 
Aug. Unt dere buckle ts of our spenders never bust. 
Madam. ) Qh , ^^ ^ ^^ m ^ 



8 OLIVET, OR A RARE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 

Ang. Veil vot3 dere matter now? 

Olivet. Mr. Monson, my everlasting gratitude is yours 
and in the language of the poet, "My friendship everlasting 
at your heart, now gladly knocks. 

Aug. I got yon vot beats dot all to smash. Ven I keeps 
you in good saur-krout, vill you always mend mine sox. 

Madam. Such a rare Teutonic specimen. 

{tickles him ander the chin 

Olivet. So jolly. (tickles him under the chin 

Aug. (aside) Ho ! vot a bicnic ! 

Madam. A rose between two thorns. 

Aug. Nein! A cabbage between dwo cauliflowers. 
(puts arm about their waists, they lay heads on his shoulders) 
Ho ! vot a bicnic. 

Enter, Maxmillian, d. f. , walks stage very excitedly. 

Max. Have I lost my wits? 

Aug. Shimony Christmas, vots dot! 
Madam awe? Olivet scream, go r. and l., August, r. 
front, scai^ed. 

Max. Some wits ! some wits ! My kingdom for some 
wits ! 

Aug. I don't got any wits ! Oh ! vate till I ketch mine 
breathe! (Madam and Olivet rush to Maxmillian, c. 

Madam. Calm yourself, Maxmillian. 

Olivet. What is the matter, Maxmillian? 

Max. Matter! matter enough! August Monson is in 
town, and on the way here. 

^ . " [• August Monson is here ! 

Aug. Yah ! I vos here, take her I don't got any objec- 
tions. 

Max. That August Monson? (points to August 

Aug. Oh ! vate till I ketch mine breathe ! 

Max. Bless my heart, if it ain't Gus Monson, but not 
the man we have to fear. 

Aug. Veil dunter unt blixen, Max. Duncan, how you 
vas? (they shake hands r. c, Madam and Olivet go l. 

Max. Gus, you are just the boy I want to see. 

Olivd. Is that not August Monson, of New York City \ 

Max. Yes, but not my worthy rival. I don't see ho\* 
you made the mistake; hav'nt time for explanations. W« 



OLIVET, OR A RA R E TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 9 

must proceed with the next act. Gus, I want you to help 
us. 

Aug. You ust bet uie I vill helups you all vot I can. 

Max. Listen. Another August Monson is on the way 
here to take Olivet away with him. We must prevent it. 

Aug. You v mts me to kick him out, ain't it? 

Max. No ! when he comes, you must play you are 
O'ivet. 

Aug. Vot! Me play vomans ! Oh! no, no, no, no! 
Vimin's don't vear pants. 

Max. We will fix that, When he comes, Madam Dear 
will introduce you as Olivet. You must play your part 
.well. He will soon be here, we must hurry. (exit, R. 

Aug. Oh! vant I make a shweet vomins ! 

Enter, Maxmilltan, r. e., with dress, blond wig, puffs, 
powders, etc. 

Max. Pull your cat, Gus. Olivet, you powder, while 
I dress him. 

Aug. Shimony Christmas, vot a bicnic! 

Bit iness of dressing him* This business can, be arried on 
"ith such speeches as may be suggested to the players 
by the business. The transformation of August into 
Olivet, may be mad 1 vjith such stife of dress as may 
suit players. When nearly made up, bell rings of 

D. F. 

Max. Great Heavens! here he comes. Madam do not 
show him up until we have finished, (exit, Madam, d. f.) 
Now put on the finishing touches and let's be oft'. 

Aug. Say, vill he scot struck mit mine shape ? 

Max. No doubt of it. 

Ang. Oh ! chimonv Christmas, vot a bicnic ! 

Mx. (strike* attitude) There ! Ne'er saw I a fairer 
d msel, form devine. 

Aug. You th ; nk he vill vant to married me on dere 
spot? 

Mux. I hope so. We will now retire to the next room 
and let Mr. Monson, prepare to meet his future wife. 

(exit, all three, L. u. E. 



10 OLIVET, OR A RARE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 
Enter, Madam and Monson, d. f. 

Madam. Make yourself at home, Mr. Monson, and I 
will inform my charge of your presence. Prepare yourself 
for a great surprise, for she is very bashful. 

(exit, L. u. e. 

Monson. (c.) For three long years hi 'ave looked for- 
ward to this hocasion. When hi should meet my 'earts 
hidle, when hi should gaze upon the bloomin' form of the one 
who his to be my companion for the rest of my natural life. 
How my hold 'eart pit-a-pats at the hanticipation of the 
event. 

Enter, August, l. u. e., hacks slowly and shyly up to 

Monson. 

Marry that bloomin' Duncan, when hi 'ave wa'ted three 
years to marry her myself? The himpudent Yankee sucker ! 
Hi can see er bin me minds hye now. A form like Venus, 
and a face like — 

Aug. Te-he-he-he-he ! 

Mon. The devil ! 

Aug. Nein ! you vos mistooken in dere party. I don't 
vos any of your relations. 

Mon. His this a bloomin' lunatic asylum ! 

Aug. I vos your Olivet ! Vy don't you kiss me, you 
olt succor? Vy don't you got smashed mit mine shape? 
Vos you goin' back on me now, ven you makes me gif up 
dere man" vot I loves? You better looks a little out you 
olt skinflint, ober I halfs you pulled for breetches of bromise. 
Spoke mit a quickness, marry me on dere spot or I vill 
skallops you mit a cheese knife unt drinks your hearts blood 
lik' she vos lager beer. Spoke ! 

Mon. Th-th-th-the devil ! 

Aug. Nein ! I toles you I vos none of your relations. 
(tragicly) Hah ! Hamlet, I vos dy fadder's viskers. (Mon- 
son retreats slowly around stage, scared, followed by 
August) You vos false by dere vows vot you made by me. 
Avay ! avay ! before I kasmash you mit a glance fun mine 
eye ! I have you in dere apples of mine eye, you cannot 
oxcape me, I vill followed you to dere ends of dere eart', 
unt stabs you in dere liver pad mit a balogne sissage. Lay 
on Macbeth unt shlock em on dere cope mit & brick stine, 



OLIVET, OB A RARE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 11 

dere fairest feller vot says, let er go Galigher ketch er by 
dere switch. Whoop ! 

Enter, Madam, l. u. e., goes l. 

Madam. My dear, calm yourself. This is no way to 
act towards a gentleman of Mr. Monson's standing. 

Aug. So-o ! Veil you ust better hold me ober I got his 
head. You olt bait headed dudelets. 

Mon. Send the bloomin' creature out of the room. 

Aug. Vot's dot ? You olt duffer. 

August makes a dive for Monson, who gets behind 

Madam. 

Madam. My dear, leave the room. I wish to have a 
talk with the gentleman. 

Aug. (aside) Oh ! vate till I ketch mine breathe ! 
Veil, ust like you say, Madam, not like I care. 

(exit, D. f. 

Mon. Hi breathe again. Madam Dear, you spoke of 
your charge being hingaged to a Mr. Duncan? 

Madam. Yes sir ! 

Mon. An' his that (points to D. r.) your charge? 

Madam. At present. 

Mon. Then tell the bloomin' sucker to take her. 

Madam. Sir ! you are very kind. I am surprised that 
so nice a man as you should remain single so long, (they 
come doivn c. duri?ig this speech) I am sure most any 
woman would be proud to become Mrs. August Monson. 

Mon. The deuce you say. (aside) Hi believe the old 
gal is trying to natter me, an' hif hi 'ad the cheek, hi'd 
propose to her on the spot, don't cher know, (aloud) Hi 
am sure others would 'ardly think it, Madam. 

Madam, (aside) This is my chance, (aloud) Mr. 
Monson, let us be seated. The mind works more smoothly 
when the body is at rest. 

Madam takes chair ivhich is r. of table and places it to the 
l. of the table — Madam takes book and they sit. 

Mon. (aside) How my old 'eart pit-a-pats. 
Madam. Mr. Monson, (moves chair towards him) have 
you ever experienced the feeling, that some great oppor* 



12 OLIVET, OR A RARE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 

tunity was wiihin your grasp, but you had nardly 'the 
presence of mind, the — the courage, as it were, to avail 
you rsel f of i t ? (slides cha ir 

Mon. Why — er — yes, Madam Dear, hi 'ave often 'ad a 
kind of a feeling, as if hi ad been, sorter been sent for and 
couldn't come, don't cher know. 

Enter, August, d. e 

Madam. (sighs, moves closer) Poor man. 
Aug. Vop, vop, vop, don't got so close, you olt sardine. 
Remember dose breetches of bromise. 

Monson springs up, sliding chair to l., gets behind Madam 
— business. 

Man. Hi'm a goner! 

Madam. Leave the room this instant. 

Mon. (shakes fist from behind Madam) You hill man- 
nered vixen. 

Aug. Vot'sdot? (business 

Mon. Save me Madam ! Save me ! 

Madam Leave the room. 

Aug. Veil, I don't got any objections. Tra-la-lu. 

(exit, d. F. 

Mon. Hi breathe again. (they sit 

Madam. Commence right where we left off, Mr. Monson. 

(moves chair up 

Mon. Yes — h-hov course — hi — 

Madam. As you were about to say, there are times 
when it seems, to all of us, that we must speak what is in 
our h^ar — a in our minds. {mores chair 

Mon. Yes — yes of course hi — (aside) My hold 'eart. 

Madam, (aside) Poor man. (aloud) While I am not 
sure that I ought to listen to you, Mr. Monson, (moves chair) 
when you spe ik to me in this personal manner, yet — 

(moves chair up 

Enter, August, d. f. 

I am sure that — 

Aug. Hamlit, I am di ladders bologne sassage! 

Mon. Br -r-r-r. (they spring up, Monson slides chair 



OLIVET, OB A RAEE1EU2 ONTO SPECIMEN. IS 

to L. T gets behind Madam — business*) Save me, Madam ! 
save me ! 

Aug. Better ven you don't got so close here. 

Mon. You hinsulting Jazebel ! 

Aug. Vot's dot ? {rushes at Monson 

Mon. Save me, Madam ! {business 

Madam. Leave the room, that's a good dear. I wish to 
talk with Mr. Monson. 

Aug. Veil, I don't got any objections. Tra-la-lu, you 
olt duffer. (exit, d. f. 

Mon. Hi breathe again. 

Madam. Sit right down again, Mr. Monson, and com- 
mence right where we left off. {they sit) 

Mon. That bloomin' thing is dangerous, Madam. Why 
don't you cage it? 

Madam, It is not dangerous, just a little eccentrical. 
A very Rare Teutonic Specimen. 

Mon. Heceecdinglv rare, Madam. Hi might say be *s*ly 
i Me. Hexcentrical 1 in leed, Madam. She is clear off 'ci 
lia'pe, Madam, cle ir off '< r base. 

Madam. She will bother us no more. By the way, I 
b.ive just received a new book of engravings, I am sure you 
would like to see. (rises, brings book. from table) It is a 
large book and you will have to move your chair closer. 
Why certainly, we can sit on the sofa. I never thought (A 
tli.it — come ! 
They put chairs bach and sit on sofa — bashful business. 

Mon. {aside) Oh ! my hold 'art ! 

Madam, Now, isn't this engraving of the courtship of 
Florence Domby and Walter Gay just lovely? 

Mon. Which is the bloomin' Gay, Madam ? 

Madam. There, look closer, don't you see him ? 

Mon. Is he courtin' ? 

Madam. You'll have to come closer, Mr. Monson. (she 
moms up) Why, Mr. Monson, you have your arm about 
my waist. (he springs np 

Mon. Hi was'nt aware of the fact, Madam. 

Madam. Oh ! never mind, sit down. Perhaps I just 
imagined it. (Monson sits 

Mon. Him so bloomin' bashful. 

Madam. I declare, I am almost afraid to let vou coma 



U OLIVET, OB A BARE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN. 

any nearer, {moves up) You look just like Walter in the 
picture. Your arm — (he starts to spring up, she holds 
him) Sit down, Mr. Monson, don't get excited. 

Mon. (aside) Hi feel my courage rise. I'm so bloomin 
bashful. 

Slowly and bashfully places arm, about her waist, she 
moves closer at same time, puts arms about his neck 
and head on his shoulder. 

Enter, August, d. f. 

Madam. This is so sudden ! 

Aug. Dot's vot I think. Break avay ! (business 

Mon. Save me, Madam ! save me ! {business 

Madam. Leave this room, Olivet. 

Mon. Call a policeman — 

Aug. Vot's dot ? (business 

Mon. Save me Madam ! 

Madam. Leave the room this instant ! 

Aug. Veil, I don't got any objections* Ot yah ! 

Madam. Sit down, Mr. Monson. (exit, August ; d. f.) 
Commence right where we left off. (they sit) You had 
just asked me to be your wife, had you not ? 

Mon. Well — ah — yes. (aside) I'm so bloomin' bash- 
ful, don't cher know. 

Madam, (lays head on his shoulder, he places arm about 
her waist) August, you bold, bold man. How on earth 
did you ever pluck up courage to ask me to be your wife. 
You know 1 never gave you a particle of encouragement. 

Mon. When I make up my mind to do anything, 
Madam, no power on earth can stop me. 

Enter, Olivet and Maxmillian, k. u. e. 
(Rivet. | W} ia t means this ? (they spring up 

Madam,. It means, my dears, that Mr. Monson has asked 
me to be his wife, and gives his consent to your marriage. 

Mon. That your charge ? That Olivet ? 

Olivet. I am Olivet, and I hope you will forgive oui 
little deception and give us your blessing. 

Mon, Oh ! hell ! 

Madam. My dear, you swore. 



OLIVET, OU A RARE TEUTONIC SPECIMEN, lb 

Mon. I'm a sucker an' I'll swear again. Madam Dear 
you promised to be my wife, an' blast my bloomin' picture, 
if I don't swear to keep you to your promise. Young peo- 
ple, except my blessing- But tell me, what's that bloomin' 
thing in petticoats here. 

Enter , August, d. f. 

Max. 'Tis a joke. 

Aug. Yah ! I vos a joke* 

Mon. Save me, Madam. (business 

Aug. Oh! don't got excited, I ust want to say you vos 
purty much fooled, {pulls off wigf) Hos-do-ker-ze-zane. 
(Monson stares) Now you see her. (puts on wig) Now 
you don't see her. {pulls wig off) I vos a joke, ain't it? 
Ho ! ho, ho, ho ! 

Mon. A light dawns upon me. 

They come d wn, Olivet and Maxmillian r., August c, 
Madam and Monson l. e. 



hie. 



Aug. A cabbage between two coliflowers, one on each 
If dey ain't one, dey soon vill be, for if he don't 
'marry her on der spot, I vill sue him for breetches ol 
b omise. 

Mon. Hi forgive you all, an' Madam Dear, I am ready 
to receive my wife any time. 

Madam. Now children, all is well that ends well. We 
nre happy and thanks ba to Gus Monson, "The Hare Teu- 
tonic Specimen." 

CURTAIN, 

THE end. 



* LITTLE GOLDIE; 4> 

OR, 

The Child of the Ca mp. 

Al Western Comedy Drama in Four (4) Acts for 11 male 
and 3 female characters, by 

MR, CHARLES 0, WILLARD, ~ 

Little Goldie is a strong Western drama. It is replete 

with startling situations, thrilling incidents and 

interesting from the beginning to the 

end. Dutch, Irish and Negro 

characters for the 

comedy parts. 

SYNOPSIS OF EVENTS. 

ACT I.— The picnic near the "Mack Hawk's" cave. The lawyers and Mike. Little 
Goldie has fun with the Judge. Mike makes love to Matilda. The Judge is appealed 
to. Matilda and the Judge. Joe arrived late. The Captain of the Mack Hawks 
shows up. Tells the gang a story. Old Jones is rich. The plot. Peter's meets old 
Jones. The struggle. Little Goldie to the rescue, backed by the Judge and his 
"cannon." "It wouldn't do in this glorious climate of Colorado." 

ACT II.— The Col. and the Maj. lament the escape of the Black Hawks. The 
Judge gets drunk. Mike tells some new. The boys "lay" for the school teacher. 
The school teacher arrives. A female. The Judge makes a speech. Joe drops in and 
cuts them all out. Matilda and the Judge. Mike gets mad. # The Capt. of the Black 
Hawks again. Little Go!die at her pranks — has trouble with Godfrey. Joe inter- 
feres. The Col. and Maj. get in their work. Judge tries to escape from Matilda. 
Mike helps him out. The recognition. The story. I will be there. The quarrel. 
"Drop that knife, or I'll fill you full of holes." 

ACT TIL— The home of Edith. Matilda tells a little gossip and departs. Joe calla 
and tells Edith of his love. The Judge hears him refused. Joe departs. The Judge 
tries his hand. Matilda unexpecetdly returns. The Judge in a fix. Little Goldie 
again. A new baby. Godfrey calls on Edith. The promise. "So will I." The Col. 
and Maj. Mike happens alon?. The Judge takes a hand. Little Goldie looking for 
Joe. Handsome Harry. "I'll play this alone if I die for it." Near the Black Hawk's 
retreat. The Black Hawks. Godfrey waiting Edith's arrival. Edith arrives. 
"Never." "Then go where you belong." Handsome Harry to the rescue. "Defend 
yourself." Harry is overpowered. The fate of a traitor. Goldie to the rescue. The 
terrible fall of Godfrey. 

ACT IV.— Bummer Jones' (George Winfred) home in Denver. Mike Flynn in 
command. The reformed Bummer. The letters. The letter from the nephew. The 
nephew arrives. Godfrey as a "Missionary." The uncle writes a letter dictated by 
the nephew. The arrival of the Judge. The murder. The Col. and Joe. Godfrey's 
claim. Mike tells what he heard. Godfrey accused of murder. "His child and 
the heiress is dead." The heiress found is Little Goldie. Handsome Harry. Godfrey 
cheats the liw. Edith and Joe. Unexpected arrival of Matilda. Happy finale. 

Amateurs will find this piece just what they want, as it 
was written expressly for them. 

PRICE 25 CENTS PER COPY. 
Order a copy of 

Ames' Publishing Co,, 

Lock Box 152, - - Clyde, Ohio. 



B* 



~^ 



iimEs' Plays — G dii tinned. 



Comedies Continued. 

176 Factory Girl 

207 Heroic Dutchman of '76 

199 Home 

174 Love's Labor Not Lost 

15* Mr.Hudgon's Tiger Hunt 

L49 New Years in N. Y 

37 Not So Bad After All 

237 Not Such a F -ol as He Looks 

126 Our Daughters 

266 Pup and the Baby 

114 Passions 

2(54 Prof. James' Experience 

Teachin'u Country School 

219 Rags and Bottles 

ile with Sharps and Flats.. 

22] Solon Shingle 

262 Tw<> Had Boys 

S7 The Biter Bit 

131 The Cigarette 

210 $2,0IIU Reward 

TRAGEDIES. 

hi The Serf 



6 


3 


8 


3 


4 


3 


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3 




6 





5 


6 


3 


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6 





3 


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3 


4 


1 


3 


2 


14 


2 




3 


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2 


4 


2 



2 (t 



6 3 



FARCES & COMEDIETTA S. 



12M 
132 
316 
289 
• 12 
303 
166 

30 

169 

2m 

so 
320 

73 
313 

.SI 

21 
12: 

• (I 

175 

8 

86 
' 22 

vl 

287 

22^ 
• JIT 
249 

1!' 

72 

19 

42 

IS^ 

220 

lis 

218 

221 

233 



rK 



A.ii-u-ag-oos 

Actor and Servant 

A. in' Gh&rl .rtes .Maid 

\ Colo e4> M soap 

\ ('Mint:. Match 

\ K « in rh" Dark 

A Texa n \1 1 >ther-in-La w 

A Day Wei 1 Spent 

A Regular Fix 

A Professional Gardener 

Alarmingly Suspicious 

All In A Mud e 

An Awfi I Criminal 

A Mitrlim king Father 

A Pet of the Public 

A Romant c Attachment 

A Thrilling Item 

A Ticker of Leave 

Betsey Baker 

Better Half 

Black vs. White 

Captain Smith 

Cheek Will Win 

Cousin .losiaii 

Cupids Capers 

Cleveland h Ri" eptiou Party. 

Double Flecti n ... 

Dor Two Surprises 

Deuce is in Him 

l>id Dream it 

Domes rie Felicity 

Dutch Prize Fiehter 

D'tchv \>. Nigsrer 

Eh? W at Did You Say 

Everybody Astonishei 
Fooling with the Wrong Man 
Freezing a Moiher-in-Law... 2 
Fun in a Post Office 4 



No. 
184 
274 
200 
13 
307 

66 
271 
116 
120 

50 
140 

74 

35 
247 

95 
305 

99 

11 
323 

99 

82 
182 
127 
22S 
302 

106 
288 
139 
231 
233 

R9 

23 
208 
212 

32 
1S6 
273 
206 
259 

44 

33 

57 
217 
165 
195 

IS' 

180 
267 
3051 

4S 
188 
115 

55 

2:;2 

241 
270 
l 
137 
252 

ns 

40 



Family Discipline 1 

Family Jars fi A> 

Goose with the Golden Eggs.. 

Give Me My Wife 

Ha'labahoola. the Medicine 

Man 

Hans, the Dutch J.P. ..'.'.'".'.". 

Hans BrummePs Cafe 

Hash 

H. M.S. Plum !!!!!!!!!!!!! 

How She has Own Way... 
How He Popped the Quest'n. 

How to Tame M-in-Law 

How Stout. Your Getting 

Incompatibility* of Temper... 

In the Wrong Clothes 

Jacob Shlaff's Mistake 

Jitnmie Jones 

John Smith '., 

•Job >nes Blate's Mistake 

Jumbo Jura 

Killing Time 

KittieV Wedding Cake....-...;. 

Lick SKillet Wedding 

Lauderbach's Little Surprise 
Locked in a Dress-maker's 

Koom 

Lodgings for Two....!..!!.........! 

Love in all Cor'-ers 

Matrimonial Bliss !. 

Match 'or a other-Min-Law.. 

More Blunders than one 

Mother'? Fool 

My Heart's in Highlands 

My Precious Betsey 

My Turn Next 

M Wife's Relations 

My Day and Now-a-Days 

My Neighbor's Wife 

Nanka's Leap Year Venture.. 

Nobody's Moke 

Obedience 

On the Sly """.'.'. 

Paddv Miles' Boy !.! 

Paten' Washing Machine..!!.! 

Persecuted Dutchman 

Poor Pilicody 2 

Quiet Family , " 4 

Rough Diamond 4 

Ripples 

Room 44 ; "' 2 

Santa Cans' Daughter .'! 5 

Selvaps j 

Sewing Circle of P< i riod.. " 

S. H. A. M. Pinafore 3 

Somebody's Nobody 3 

Stage Struck Yankee 4 

Struck hy Lightning 2 

Slick and Skinner fi 

Slasher and Crasher 5 

Taking the Census 1 

Thar Awful Carpet Bag.. 3 

That Rascal Pat ' " 3 

T)vt Mysterious B'dle. 



_j6 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 




y 



016 102 832 t 



iiniBS ? Plays — CnntinuBd. 



:;s Tin- B- ■witched Closet, ■> 

lul The Coining an •; 

167 Turn Him Out •'* 

291 The Actor's Scheme * 

308 The Irish Squire of Squash 

Ridge I 

285 TheMashers Mashed •; 

68 The Sham Prof 'ssor 4 

295 The Spellin' Skew! { 

54 The Two T.'J's 4 

23 fhirtr-three Next Birthday.. 4 

292 Tim Plannigan ■> 

t42 Tit for Tat 2 

276 The Printer and His Devils.. 3 

263 Trials of a Country Ed-tor... 6 

7 The Won-Verful Telephone.... 3 

281 Two Aunt Emily " 

312 Uncle Eth*n 4 

2iW Uniust Justice 6 

170 U.S. Mail 2 

213 Vermont Wool Dealer 5 

151 Wanted a Husband 2 

56 Wooing Under Difficulties 5 

70 Which will he Mnrry 2 

13* Widower's Trials 4 

117 Waking Hiin Up 1 

155 Why they Joined the Re- 
becca* " 

111 Yankee Duelist 3 

157 Ya. kee Peddler •" 

ETHIOPIAN FARCES. 

204 A-caHem'v of Stars 6 

325 \ Ooincidenc ■ s 

65 An Unwelcome Return •"> 

i •". An Unhappy Pair 1 

L72 Black Shoemaker 1 

Black Statue 

222 Colored Senators 3 

214 Chops 

Cuff's Luck 2 

hi!) Crimps Trip ■' 

27 Fetter Lane to Oravesend ... 2 

230 Hamlet the Dainty 6 

1 1 aunted House 

103 How Sister Paxey got her 

Child. Baptized 2 

24 Handy Andy 

236 Hypochondriac The 

319 In For ft » 

47 In the Wrong Box 

77 Joe's Vis t 

88 Mischievous Nigeer ' 



" 



256 

128 
90 

244 
234 



:4t; 



l 



177 

90 

107 

133 

179 

94 

243 

25 

92 

238 

10 

64 

253 

2S2 

122 

118 

6 

108 

245 

4 

197 

216 

206 
210 
203 
205 
U6 



17 

no- 



Midnight Colic 

Musical Darkey 

No Cure No Pay 

Not as Deaf as 
Did Clot 

Old Dad's Cabin 

Old Pomney 

Othello.;... 

Other People's Child 
Pomp Green's Snak 

Pomp's Pranks 

Prof. Bones'La test Inventioi 

Quarrel ome Servants 

Rooms to Let 

School 

Seeing Bosting 

Sham Doctor 

16.000 Years Ago 

Snorts on a Lark 

Sport with a Sportsman 

Stage Struck Darkey 

Strawberry Shortcake 

Stocks Up, Stocks Down 

That Bov Sam 

The Best Cure 4 

The Intelligence Office 3 

The Select School 

The Popcorn Man 3 

The Studio 3 

Those Awful Boys 5 

Ticket Taker 3 

Twain's Dodging 3 

Tricks "> 

Uncle Jeff 5 

Vice Versa 3 

Villkens and Dinah 4 

Virginia Mummy 6 

Who Stole the Chickens I 

William Tell 4 

Wig-Maker and HisSei -\ 

GUIDE BOOKS. 

Hints on Elocution 

Hints to Amateurs 



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Festival of Days 

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